The 3 Most Important Books for Authentic Relating

Very few things emerge completely out of nothing.

There's a process of mapping the territory, experimenting, documenting and cataloging, and always always continuing to learn.

The practice of Authentic Relating was born from a cocktail of personal experience, studies, social experimentation, and of course: some amazing books.

So if you want to dig in to the more theoretical and intellectual side of Authentic Relating, here are a few books we think are just plain foundational!

Getting Real: 10 Truth Skills You Need to Live an Authentic Life. Susan Campbell

According to Authentic Relating teacher Jason Digges, "This was the original book that we all used as source material before AR had anything written down. Susan Campbell is a gem of a teacher." If you're familiar with Authentic Relating in any capacity, a lot of Campbell's core concepts might feel familiar. The ten truth skills include Letting Yourself Be Seen, Taking Back Projections, Saying No, Welcoming...

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A Week in the Life of COnnect!

authentic community Jan 14, 2022


You’ve gotten the Authentic Revolution emails, but always held back on trying out the live events. You don’t have enough time. It’s intimidating. Today, though, you decided to do the free trial, and attend two weeks’ worth of events. You want more community, and you want someone else to hold the space for once - so, why not?

The email comes with your login, and you get on the platform. First, you hit a screen with some steps and cultural intentions. The intentions seem useful: Show up prepared, honor ourselves, own our experience, hear others out. Try not to give advice, fix, coach, or therapize. It feels exciting to find a space where you could be yourself, and not be judged for it.

You click into the “Start Here” and read about COnnect’s practices. What’s up with the capital O, anyways? Turns out the FAQ tab answers that. You check out a few Resources, and then browse through the Calendar to see what your options...

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The Art of Mourning

I still think about my second boyfriend.

I had just moved to Texas. I met him at a country dancing bar one of my first nights out in town. I was 17; I snuck in on a fake ID, fingers crossed for the chance to experience “adulting”.

He was a cowboy from the hill country. I had never fallen so hard for anybody. I would bike multiple times a week across town, 45 minutes up a huge hill to land sweaty and delighted at his Christian university and spend a couple hours talking, playing ping-pong, and listening to him play guitar.

He called me one day as I was preparing to go to class. “It’s over,” he said. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I was in shock. “No,” I said, and hung up the phone. Then I knelt down, my head in my hands, there on the sidewalk. It took me many months to feel okay again.

The cowboy still comes to my mind sometimes. Not because I miss him or want to be back together — I don’t feel like we ever really...

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The Growth of Authentic Community

authentic community Jan 23, 2018
by Sara Ness

I don’t know why, but in the last few weeks I’ve been getting messages like this regularly.

Perhaps it’s The Atlantic article that came out last month that brought Authentic Relating more into the mainstream.

Perhaps it’s the spread of communities through people like Bridgett, who are touching more and more people.

Perhaps it’s Youtube videos, or manuals, or word of mouth, or the new Authentic Relating training companies emerging, or all of the above!

Either way, it’s really cool to see. From the ALFT and other trainings in the past few years, there are now communities in Seattle, Boston, Burlington, DC, Dallas, Hawaii, England, Amsterdam, and more (you can see most of them on the map. Seattle’s community is featured in the picture on this post). I got a flyer this week from a Burlington facilitator for AR Games after a church service!

It feels like we are truly becoming a movement, and the possibility of spreading...

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